A number of studies profiled in this issue of FORUM have found that staff experience a considerable
amount of stress. But for those of you who are fortunate enough not to count yourselves among this
group, the following is a sure-fire recipe for joining the ranks of the stressed. For those of you who
can say that you often experience stress, the following points should help you to maximize your stress
level.
- Do not communicate openly by expressing how you feel. Do not
ask for what you need, and certainly do not ask for what you want -
just let people walk all over you.
- Harbour resentment and complain often. Gripe and whine for
at least 2.5 hours per day to anybody who will listen, especially to
bosses, co-workers, family members and friends. Such behaviour helps
you avoid intimacy and emotional ties, and personal isolation is very
stressful.
- Do not feel confident enough in your skills, values and beliefs
to express your opinions and concerns. Blindly accept the judgments
of others, personalize all criticisms and remain offended.
- Do not develop a support system of any kind. No close friends,
no pets, no social activities, no extended family - nothing. Never ask
for help of any kind from anyone. Languish in loneliness and suffer,
suffer, suffer!
- Practise nasty, mean, humiliating, embarrassing and hateful behaviours
toward other people. Gossip at every opportunity and concentrate
on making other people look bad. Your turn is guaranteed to come.
- Become a workaholic. It's easy to do. Just put work before
everything else. Take work home every day and every weekend. Never take
a vacation that lasts more than 28 hours, and definitely work on holidays.
The goal is to burn out.
- Avoid the urge to manage time. Be available to everyone, take
on more projects than you can handle and say yes to whatever is asked.
Cultivate the myth that you work better under pressure. After all, you
must do everything yourself because you're the only one who can do things
right.
- Procrastinate, procrastinate, procrastinate. As Mark Twain
said, "Never put off for tomorrow what you can put off for the day after
tomorrow." If it were not for the last minute, lots of things would
never get done.
- Do not get enough sleep or rest. Lack of sleep reduces your
ability to deal with stress by making you irritable - a sure-fire sign
of stress.
- Don't exercise regularly. As a matter of fact, don't exercise
at all. Exercise only tones your muscles, improves your cardiovascular
system and relaxes your nerves. Physical activity allows you a "fight
outlet" for mental stress. Exercising also wastes time that could be
better spent on stress-producing situations.
- Eat and drink anything you want. Don't avoid fat, sugars,
salt, red meat or caffeine. Strive to be at least 35 pounds overweight
- excess weight maximizes stress on your heart.
- Increase your intake of drugs. Take that valium, aspirin,
alcohol and cigarette. Ignore those warning signs from your body when
you are under stress.
- Ignore whatever you read about the benefits of relaxation exercises.
Positive self-talk, mental imaging, deep breathing, massages, yoga or
anything else that relaxes you - avoid it. How can you possibly be stressed
if you're relaxed?
- Adopt the hurry-flurry-work syndrome. This is a great method
for putting a lot of pressure on yourself. The H-F-W syndrome makes
you think you're so important - "Look at me, look at how hard I'm working."
Because you are so stressed, you must be working hard. Also, H-F-W could
help you avoid responsibility. You look so overworked and worried that
people don't want to ask you for anything.
- Keep your problems to yourself. Since it helps to share worries
with someone you trust and respect, your best bet for staying stressed
is to suffer in silence.
- Make every effort not to have fun. Beware of fun: you might
laugh and enjoy yourself, and this is definitely detrimental to creating
stress.
- Remain inflexible, narrow-minded and bigoted, and avoid change.
This allows you to get upset and stay upset about anything because you
are convinced that you know everything.
- Keep work and play imbalanced. No hobbies, recreational activities,
movies, plays, books, concerts, walks in the park, visits with others,
museums and games - avoid anything that could be mistaken as a cure
for stressful situations.
- Spend no time cultivating self-understanding. Give no thought
to yourself, your values, goals or purpose in life. Give no time to
analyzing your problems; just blame everything on your spouse, friends
or family.
- Set no goals and make no plans. Setting goals and making plans
to reach them brings order and direction to your life. Personal goals
force you to take care of yourself and your relationships. Career goals
make you responsible for work success. Money goals mean that you're
in control of your wealth. With no personal, career or financial goals,
you can make sure that you remain distressed. If you don't know where
you are going, anywhere you end up is O.K.!
Reprinted, with slight modifications, from C.C.W. Hines and W.C. Wilson, "A No-Nonsense
Guide to Being Stressed," Management Solutions, October (1986): 27-29. FORUM is grateful to the
American Management Association for granting permission to use this article.
|
